Saturday, July 14, 2007

been getting headaches over the last few days. dunno wads up with my brain man. was totally stoned out during rehearsal yesterday and during half of tuition today. and now yet again.

i feel darn guilty for eating 3 apple strudels. so much for dieting. i swear i m not gonna eat anymore crap tmr. no no no. just 1 cup of coffee before dinner. thats it.

anyway. met manda and shelly today. haha. guess that makes all three of us. shellys such an inspiration to me. u know its like everytime i think of whether i wanna go back. and i look at shelly. i just think she bares such a great testimony for Jesus. and i guess thats how all christians shud be. and it really makes me think twice about forsaking my spirituality. that i m in jc and i m attached and everyone else is pretty much in the same situation. yet different outcomes of the same circumstances and different learning points and hence different directions. good on you cousin!

anyway. spent a great deal of time out today. feeling totally spaced out. tuition, den college day, den aunts place. the travelling was tiring. spent some nice time with my dearie thou. u made my day today! thanks for coming to bishan to meet me for lunch and being such a dear all the way to pjc haha. and den for pei-ing me up to clementi. i love u! haha. and i promise i ll buy u earrings when u see some desirable ones!

college day was 50 percent inspiration and 50 percent perspiration i guess. haha. considering i was kinda far from the fans. just for ur info. electrical fans not stadium fans. lol. i thought one of the jokes was funny. sorry i m a person driven by imagery. so i cant help visualizing the whole joke the speaker said, made it way more funny for me. maybe thats why i m so easilly entertained.

after two whole weeks for slacking. i think its time to pick up again. to start. i have uninstalled fm and set up study partners on various days of the week. heh. would be nice to see myself on college day next year. anyway, was thinking if i would get anything for council, and i m really not sure. haha. even thou i admit i havent been the most committed and dedicated one, but i feel i really did do my part. i procrastinated, but i did my utmost in producing the best quality i could. worked my socks off in my adhoc planning com. and i the littles things like clean up the pubco cupboard when no one bothered, pack up the sanctuary, made sure my Scappers were doing fine.

but one cant help but wonder. when everything has to be so transparent. when efficiency is valued over quality. when council is dominated mainly by a certain clique. when attendence measures commitment. when these values are satisfied by everyone else. is all that u did enough to earn you more than just a cert but rather appreciation from the college as well. one just cant help but wonder, if there were ever a point scoring system for everything u did in council. would the little, unnoticable and not so prominent things, coupled with routine and moments of pure inspiration earn you any points.

oh wells. just my thoughts today. cheers people!

|cowpoo| 10:27 PM|

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